Couples counselling & Therapy

In couples counselling & therapy I can help you and your partner to gain insight into your relationship, resolve conflict and improve your relationship satisfaction utilizing a variety of therapeutic techniques. 

Sex, money and kids are the three biggest issues for couples, the single biggest concern couples have is communication. We long to feel close and to be understood by those we love and with whom we share our lives, this is what makes us human. 

In couples counselling, You will learn how to:

• Connect better by knowing and naming your own needs and learning to understand and respond to your partner’s needs.

• Learn skills for speaking and listening so they can work through issues.

• Manage differences that often result in conflict, and manage conflict when it arises, so that it does not become destructive.

• Identify and overcome emotional barriers that keep you distant from each other.

• Become more comfortable with their own and their partner’s sexuality and intimacy needs

How will You do this?

In the initial stage is a process of us getting to know one another and calming of your anxiety and distress in this difficult situation. We will identify the beliefs, behaviours and patterns of interaction which are causing problems. You will be learning to pay attention to what is happening between you in a different way. Usually, I schedule an individual appointment with each of you, to get to know more about your background, family history, and personal perspective on what is happening in your relationship.

While learning how to acknowledge and gain awareness of your patterns, you will be learning a lot about yourselves and each other, and finding ways to share that learning. You can begin to develop ways to communicate more clearly and honestly with each other, without blaming and defensiveness, you will discover you can be more real with each other, so that you can feel a deepening sense of connection and trust. Using your improved ability to communicate, we will work on long-standing issues and differences, and with current ‘hot spots’ in the relationship.

Identify your goals: How do you want your relationship to be different? 

Take responsibility: Be willing to acknowledge the contribution you are making to the current problem. Be conscious of the choices you are making and their impacts for others and for yourself.

Pay attention: :  It will be important to notice what is going on when you get caught in old patterns of behaviour, or when you succeed with new ones. What is happening for me right now? What are I thinking? How are you feeling? Learning to be mindful of what you are experiencing allows you to catch yourself before you react in the same old way, and help you respond in a new way. 

Be honest: Share your feelings, your hopes and fears, about what is happening between you and what is happening in sessions.

Be realistic: Small obtainable goals help move you towards your big goals. 

Be patient: Problems take a long while to develop and be identified; they seldom disappear overnight. 

Take care of yourself: Couple counselling is not an easy process: you may be challenged, hurt, frightened; you will definitely experience a lot of uncertainty. Make sure you are getting adequate support, taking care of your health and maintaining those things in your life that, individually or as a couple, bring you pleasure.